Asunder in the Abattoir

I don’t write because I want to
I write because I need to
Release the demons from my mind
Other people cant see them

Valiums to clear their voices
Somethings still holding me down
In my head I kick and scream
In my own tears I drown
And I forget how to swim
Going under again
Reaching for your hand
But your no longer there

I’m all alone with these thoughts
Trying to hold back the tears
Just dreaming of a thrill
To replace the regret from
The last ten years

Swallow my fear
But can’t even swallow food
So hungry but can’t eat
While I got these cold chills
Throwing up in the mornings
Eating vitamins instead of food

I don’t just hate you cause you lie
You always try to justify
Telling me the reasons why
As I lay with you beside

Blade to my wrist
Just to know I’m still alive
Red horizons drip beneath me
As I start to smile


About Amethyst Wilton

IT student from the Blue Mountains. I write poetry, lyrics, draw and paint.
This entry was posted in Anxiety, Creative Writing, Demons, Drugs, Poem, Poetry and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Asunder in the Abattoir

  1. katrital says:

    Reblogged this on katrital and commented:
    ….Even when I’m breathing, I’m not someone that isn’t able to write. It’s just an easier way of pouring out the thoughts that always stick by me.


  2. Please know you are not alone. Most people do not see or believe in the “demons” that exist in people’s minds. People tend to believe in only what they can see and touch. But for creative people , the unseen is more real than the seen.
    There are those of us who believe you that the things you speak of are there. People cut themselves when they see no other way to release the pain. When they feel that they are the only person that knows the reality of the confusion and the darkness.
    I hope and pray for you that you can find some validation through the other creative writers here that are also suffering from mental tortures. I feel your pain and fear for you based on this poem.
    You are not alone or unthought of.


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